Who Will Cry for the Little Boy?

"Who will cry for the little boy, lost and all alone?

Who will cry for the little boy, abandoned without his own.

Who will cry for the little boy? He cried himself to sleep.

Who will cry for the little boy? He never had for keeps.

Who will cry for the little boy? As He walked the burning sand.

Who will cry for the little boy? The boy, inside the man.

Who will cry for the little boy? Who knows well hurt and pain.

Who will cry for the little boy? He died... and died again.

Who will cry for the little boy? A good boy he tried to be.

Who will cry for the little boy, who cries inside of me?"

Author~ A. Fisher

Dandelion...Perre Shelton

Bah Bah Black Sheep

If I were a black sheep, I would understand the reason I graze in a field alone... and I would already know why no one stays, family runs and love lingers not, if I were a black sheep....

If I were a black sheep I could comprehend the complexities in the coarseness of my wool, the uniqueness of my look, and why I am so distinctly different; not easily conformed, or braided into the mindless folds of the worlds' fabricated reality... for simply being... a black sheep... I'm rejected and ejected...

As a black sheep I’d be born into the awareness of being odd, fueld by struggled attempts to become mainstream and normal... They’d all just be my repeated strokes of failure... I’d be too concious of being a black sheep and too selfish to not...

"YESSIR, YESSIR, I’m 3 bag’s so very full..." one bag jam packed with charred heartaches, festering heartbreaks and scarred flesh... another bag overflowing with a lingering darkness in the corners of my eyes, expectations of hurt and lies floating like an oily film over the desires of my mind... and the last sullied sack, dirty with marks of being pulled through fluttering relationships, judgements and slanders... a black sheep...

I stand here in the openess of life, grazing in my field alone... It’s a picture perfect display called "the black sheep" the one un-pretty, the odd one, the one that just doesn’t fit in with the rest... that black sheep... motherless, abandoned, mis-used and distrusted... that ugly ass black sheep, un-wanted, nothingness and indifferent, angry and bitter... incapable of loving or giving worth... that black sheep... that gh’at damned black sheep...

It’s his pride of being.... that keeps him, the black sheep...

Imperfectly Perfect

It was yesterday that I realized there is so much perfection in imperfection...

As I felt the stings of steaming hot water repeatedly beat against my face, and as it ran over the curves of my freshly shaven head and warmed the erection of my chest... I moved my hands throughout my body, and I began to understand that my design, as imperfect as it is, was made just for me...

Maybe it was the fragrance of the soaps, the intoxication of the moment.. or just the reality that ‘Baby, today this shower was feeling waaaaaay to good..." A smile slid smoothly across my face as I lower my head and allowed the heat of the water to cascade down the nape of my neck and find its own pathway down this mountain of me...

Dripping from head to toe, front to back, this full bodied, big boned, dark skinned man stepped out of the steaming hot shower and caught a glimpse of an imperfectly perfect creation... it was in that moment... I had another reason to love me...

I was so comfortable with the extra lump over here, The thickness, the fullness , the massive man that in the past seemed to get lost in a constantly defeating struggle to change what God had made... I grabbed that big of chunk that seemed to be glued back there and didn’t want to go away, I rubbed that roll that always shows itself at the wrong time, (especially when you want to wear a fitted shirt), I held on to my he-bobs and shook them for the mirror, "dammit bitch, they are mine, so fuck you if you don’t like them, someone will..." The thighs, oh the thighs... but "baby, they mine" and no anorexic, runway walking, starving themselves to death, non bread eating, Ben and Jerry’s avoiding, flat assed toothpick, can make me hate them ever again... . see all the things that society says "aint cute..." In this moment was looking all to fabulous.

As the towel traveled the curves, dried the corners, an and dived into all the secret spots... I saw beauty in blemishes, character in scars, dignity in dimples and joy in just simply loving me..

Imperfection is perfectly designed...So What!, If what I am, is not what you are... what I do is not what you do... your images of perfection are not my celebration any longer...

Dripping wet, towel dried, lotioned down, fully clothed or just butt ass naked...
I’ll be Imperfect for you ... yet always perfect...for me...

when you need some real words...

...

There are so many lines in this clip that people need to take to heart.. listen and learn..

"if people wanna walk out your life, let them go... and whatever they running after, they will see what they had in a minute and by then it will be too late to come back..."

"you gonna always mess up when you mix seasonal people with lifetime expectations..."

" some people are like leaves on a tree, the wind blows this way they over here,

it blows the other way they go there..."

"most people are like leaves, taking from the tree, they take life and give shade..."

"but if you find you two or three people like the roots of a tree, you are blessed..."

listen and learn baby.. LISTEN and LEARN...

Acidic Cry

I didn't think I still had anything left in me, because I had practiced so diligently at being stone... Void of emotions and feelings just a go hard, no nonsense type of brotha ... I really didn't care anymore and nothing seemed to matter.. U were gone, we were thru and it was done... so I shed a tear...

In the reality of this world we've created, men don't cry.. I mean, we walk through life as a blank canvas with no color or expression and nothing that moves the soul.. At least that's what I thought, its just simply what I was taught, you get hurt, you dust it off and you move on... Until you get the taste of that tear...

You knew that I knew... and in the midst of you not trying to hurt me, you ended up destroying me more, desecrating the concepts of friendship, loyalty and respect... What was that I really did again??? Over and over... cyclone funnels of drama, mess, lies, drama, mess ,lies.. Drama.. Mess.. Lies... Maybe it was all purposed, who knows? A directly calculated maneuver of repayment.. the result... just a single flesh burning tear...

I accepted my rage, I acknowledge my pain, but I loathed the contempt that was left floating like a cloudy film of oil over crystal clear water... I do take ownership for my mistakes... I mean, we've all got scars, from the shoulda, woulda, coulda's... But imagine acid slowing dripping into a wound you thought was healed, yea thats feeling.. It mimics me perfectly.... All I could do was watch the devastating crumble of me, when there were no tears..no pain.. It just endured... I, endured... until today...When I shockingly shed a tear...

See, its from the idea that through it all, we were supposed to be better.. You said you had my back,... you said you would be there.. You said.... You said.. Well you know what you said.... And ignorantly I believed you ... even after all of it.. I still believed you.. and That's why I cant loose this thing, that bore my tear... This.. this..this insane thing that I have to carry, when you knew all along what was really real... And you abused it.. You raped my state of mind..and left me emotionally naked and bleeding alone in this world... guess I deserved it huh.. I did make my heart readily available... but even when given the opportunity to do it the right way.. You did it this way.. Your way.. Always the low way... the only way.. Option never priority... and here I am left with a tear...
A symbolic remembrance of trying... struggling..accepting.. Overlooking..Pretending... and even loving... yea... ironic isn't it.. Still loving you... maybe it's the idea of it... wallowing in it, dancing in it.. Stepping boldly through it...

So, when gazing back at the strength of your own reflection.. I want you to vividly see the times when your eyes met mine... and see how much of you was in me and how I was in you... feel my embrace.. my breathe on your neck... Hear my laugh, remember your grin, taste our kiss and focus on that photo of us trapped in time... Because it's all those things I once had, that are nowcaptured by one tear... that's slowly searing its way down the curves of my face....

Waitress- Liza Jesse Peterson

Bid Em In... and more from Oscar Brown Jr.

A new favorite... too bad and sad I'm just learning about him... hope you enjoy!

Wednesday Words of Wisdom

Don't spend major time with minor people

If there are people in your life that continually disappoint you, break promises, and stomp on your dreams, too judgmental, have different values and don't have your back during difficult times... that is not a friend. To have a friend, is to be a friend. Sometimes in life as you grow, your friends will either grow or go. Surround yourself with people who reflect positive values, goals, interests and lifestyles. When I think of any of my successes, I am thankful to GOD from whom all blessings flow, and to my family and friends that enrich my life and encourage my progress. Over the years my phone book has changed because I decided to change it, for the better. At first you may think you're going to be alone, but after a while new people show up in your life that seem to make your life so much sweeter and easier to endure. Remember what your elders used to say, "Birds of a feather,flock together." So, if you're a swan, don't hang around pigeons!

I love the Lord and thank Him for all that he does in my life, therefore, I'm passing this on. Yes I do love Jesus. He is my source of existence and my Savior. He keeps me functioning each and everyday. Without Him, I am nothing but with Him I can do all things. Phil 4:13

Be Positive - Be Progressive... Take the time to make a positive difference in someone's life. Walk by faith, not by sight. Receive God's blessings. Heal the past; live the present; dream the future.

Daring

How daring of you to love me with a lie,

How dare you laugh at my pain, How dare you delight in my heartache.
How dare you tell me I was the lead actor, when I was really the support cast...
How dare you enter my world, and allow me entrance into yours, when you knew there was no intention to stay,

How daring, you loved me with a lie...

How dare you listen to my past, pretend to be my future and revel in my present,
How dare you tell me " I'm all" when I was only a part,
How dare you let me open up, close down and open up again...

How daring, you loved me with a lie...

How dare u let me vision you, understand you, and respect what you said was you...
How dare you think we call us friends, when your knife wound still burns my spine,
How dare you paint new colors for me, create new worlds, open new doors...
How dare you cleverly get inside me, slither through me, nestling warmly behind the safety of my walls,

How daring, you loved me with a lie...

How dare you stay in my head, How dare you burn images in my mind,
How dare you become so routine,
How dare you leave me to make love to "why", to embrace "did I" or " was I",
How dare you give me the illusion of us...
How dare you say my short comings were invisible, when in your reality they beat down your door...

HOW...DARE.... YOU... HOW... DARE.... YOU...HOW DARE YOU...

How ... dare I, be so ready to fill myself with another,
how dare I, still adore you... to still want to understand...
the audacity of me to cover my pain and not flush out its bitter taste...
How dare I... not fully accept your coldness... for believing, and thinking that I had finally found the one... How dare I, even think there was a "one"...

How daring, of me... for simply... wanting to be loved...

A Poem of Tribute

Homophobia- Author Unknown

I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.

I am the boy who never finished high school, because I got called a fag everyday.

I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.

I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.

I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.

We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.

I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.

I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.

I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.

We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.

I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.

I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.

I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.

I am the woman who died when the EMTs stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.

I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I didnt have to always deal with society hating me.

I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.

I am a warrior for my country serving proud, but can't be my true self because gays aren't allowed in the military.

I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.

I am the person ashamed to tell my own friends I'm a lesbian, because they constantly make fun of them.

I am the boy tied to a fence, beaten to a bloody pulp and left to die because two straight men wanted to "teach me a lesson."

I am the branch from a tree with a thosand limbs, and a million roots; painted all the brightest colors of the rainbow.